Without self-confidence and self-esteem some women fall prey to insecurity, inadequacy and can be easily denigrated and “put down” by others seeking to diminish their intelligence and skills. Remember, you have your own unique opinions, brains and beauty and you can achieve your dreams. It should be noted that “self-esteem” is not the same as the negative behavior of “narcissism” which is an “inordinate fascination with oneself, excessive, self-love and vanity.”
Merriam Webster‘s Dictionary defines self-esteem as, “confidence and satisfaction in oneself.” Having confidence and satisfaction means that you know who you are and what skills you can rely on. Being satisfied with yourself means you have found comfort with who you are and won’t allow someone to claim that you are less than you are.
This is the opposite of feeling sorry for yourself, feeling afraid, being insecure and engaging in out-of-control egotism or self-destructive behaviors. Lack of self-confidence can push women towards reliance on prescription drugs, illegal drugs and/or alcohol; overeating, violent thoughts and even committing crimes.
History shows that self-esteem can be difficult for women for color, who are often denigrated from early ages. However, evidence also shows that women of color from diverse backgrounds can achieve greatness—and you can too. Serena and Venus Williams came from modest economic circumstances in Compton, Ca. but due to tremendous trust in their father, they used their talents to achieve worldwide status in tennis.
Another example is Oprah Winfrey who was born into a complicated family life but, she focused on school–got a scholarship to the HBCU Tennessee State University, became an honors student, won a statewide beauty contest and the rest is history.
A third example is Ava Duvaney, a young lady from California, who spent summers with family in Selma, Ala. While there, Ava paid close attention to the history of Selma, when the opportunity arose, she wrote and produced the historic film “Selma,” that won national acclaim.
But, you say, “I don’t want to be a tennis star, a television producer or film producer so, why do I need high self-esteem?” You need high self-esteem if you are a single mom, a housewife, a teacher or work at a school, corporation, government agency, restaurant, law enforcement or, drive a postal truck. Beautiful, smart women of color in every part of society, are repeatedly confronted with challenges such as being overlooked for promotions, dealing with family members in prison, coping with illnesses of family members, poverty, racism and discrimination.
