Graduation day is looming up for me. Honestly, my anxiety has been at an all-time high. I’ve been dealing with a lot of procrastination and avoidance behaviors because the unknown makes me nervous. I feel like it’s crunch time and, as graduation day approaches, I should have all the answers. I know I won’t, however, I can’t stop feeling that way.
As I step into my next chapter, mentally, I feel pressured to put my money where my mouth is. I feel like if I don’t do all the great things, my naysayers who tried to extinguish my flame will be right. I have an entrepreneurial spirit and am still determining which direction to go in because I want to do so many different things.
I’m carrying the weight of my own world on my shoulders. It’s really a confusing time because I’m so aware of all the things I can do and want to do, yet simultaneously not knowing what to do. I’m really struggling with the pressure to do something great. The pressure isn’t to supersede what others expect of me but what I expect from me instead of the dreams I don’t share with others, the life I have visualized for myself.
What is causing the pressure?
The pressure is a culmination of all the different types of side hustles that I’ve done over the past few years while going to school, coming together to create some kind of non-nonlinear career path. Oh, the woes of being in multi-passionate creative. Meaning, I not only have many interests but also have many talents. I’ve heard that you shouldn’t turn your hobby into a job, and I’m stressing over how to combine all my skills into a career. I feel that at the age of 44, my next step to becoming an adult is choosing my path. The idea of only choosing one feels like torture.
As the countdown to graduation ticks away, my anxiety peaks, fueled by the weight of uncertainty and the pressure to have it all figured out. Despite the looming expectations, I find myself at a crossroads, grappling with the multitude of passions and talents that pull me in different directions.
The journey ahead feels daunting yet filled with endless possibilities waiting to be explored. As I navigate the transition into adulthood, I’m reminded that the path to success isn’t always linear, and perhaps embracing my multifaceted identity as a creative is the key to unlocking a fulfilling career. Though the pressure to choose just one path persists, I’m determined to forge ahead, trusting in the journey and the promise of discovering where my true passions lie.
💋 NR (follow me on Facebook & Instagram)
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